Talk Town With Toddlers

I've got to start documenting some of the random thoughts Finn & Belle feel compelled to voice.  I've no doubt sharing them here will fall under the 'must have only been funny if you were standing right there' category.  Regardless, if I don't document them here . . . I'm not sure I ever will.

While eating breakfast this morning, the following transpired: 

Finn:  I like Daisy (Duck).
Belle:  MayBelle does NOT like Daisy.
Me:  That's nice Finn.  Mirabelle who do you like then?
Belle:  MayBelle likes milk.

Pin It On Me

The moment Finn & Belle are old enough for us to convert the playroom back to a formal sitting room . . . I plan on buying one of these:

Thanks to Pintrest I now know wine barrel wine racks exist (even if they are ridiculously overpriced).  I'm loving Pintrest and apparently I'm not alone.  This cool site lets me bookmark my favorite web finds and 'pin' them to a group message board.  Like Twitter, people can follow my pins and like Facebook I can share other people's pins with my network of friends.  If I were still in Marketing, I'd already be drafting a proposal to integrate this into my campaigns.

However, now that I'm the proud mother of two year old twins, I find it way more enjoyable getting paid to drink good wine!!  Let's face it, toddler twins and amazing wines have got to be the perfect pairing.

In case you were wondering . . . the wine business is doing amazingly well!  I promoted to a career level position back in October (just 10 months after signing on).  I'll drink to that!!

You Just Did What!?!

Yes, I took a two month break from blogging.  Then, while designing this year's holiday card, made the rash decision to post the 'big reveal' here first.  Mainly to make the three remaining followers I still have feel special--and recieve the $10 off coupon promised by Shutterfly for posting their widget . . . but mainly for you good folks.

So, a little background on the card.  We literally travelled 'over the river and through the woods' to get to Grandma's house this Thanksgiving (more on that later).  Included in our road trip was an overnight stay with my sweet friend Meighan.  She has returned to the South from the glamorous land of the pacific northwest--in a place where the sun suffers from chronic fatigue syndrome and refuses to show up for work at least 300 days out of the year and yet the world still seems to revolve around it.

Since I've been campaigning these past ten years to get all my dearest friends to live within a few hours car ride from here, I felt sweet victory when Meighan told me she was relocating to be closer to family (and friends, I'm almost certain she said friends).  So, Dave & I carved out some vacation time to swing by her new home and give everyone a proper 'house warming'.  For those curious, a proper house warming involves a slew of snotty nosed toddlers incapable of sharing and lots of wine (lots and lots of wine).

Meighan specifically asked I bring my 'fancy camera' to capture some family photos for holiday cards.  Brilliant idea!  I even did some online research for scenic photo spots in the area (i.e. I polled all my Facebook friends living in upstate SC) and started coordinating holiday outfits for Finn & Belle.  Of course, an hour into our road trip I realized one crucial flaw in all my planning--I forgot the 'fancy camera'.

So, this year's holiday greeting card moments came courtesy of the iPhone 4 and Camera + app.  If only the Apple store would offer a $10 off coupon for this shameless plug . . .

They would hold hands, but refused to look at the camera . . .

Smiles, but still no looking at the camera . . . 

He wanted to show me all the leaves . . . but not look at the camera. 

Stationery card

Shining Joy Holiday Card

Turn your family photos into holiday cards this season.

View the entire collection of cards.

He's Kickin' It Old School

A few weeks ago Finn & Belle realized they were tall enough to open the drawers to their bathroom sink.  Of course, these are the same drawers we used to dump utterly useless baby paraphernalia we mistakenly thought were life saving devices during those 'Dark Ages' (aka first 9 months).  

Somehow the twins honed in on their old pacifiers--amidst the diaper creme, baby thermometers and owners manuals for every bathroom gadget ever made.  For about a week they insisted on taking Mr. & Mrs. Binky everywhere.  Here's a rare moment when one actually worked.

With A Name Like Her's, Of Course It'd Be Beautiful!

I'd like to introduce my new favorite obsession:  the Mirabel Dress--a J. Crew toddler dress currently on clearance for the bargain price of $42!!  Considering my personal shopping limit for toddler dresses is between $10 - $15, I've calculated Lady Belle needs to wear this dress at least 2.3 times per week in order for this investment to fully pay itself off . . .

Starting Off With A Bang!

Preschool is starting soon, so off to our favorite kiddie salon for some much needed haircuts. Since Lady Belle's hair is still coming in, we had the stylist clean up her shag and even out the ten strands of hair on her head.  Hopefully these new bangs are more resistant to the syrup/yogurt/oatmeal combination that inevitably ends up there every morning.

Day 3: Siesta In A Sienna

Gulp.  Maybe I should have rented the Honda Odyssey . . . 

of course Dave has no problems pointing out the flaws in this logic.

Things I would rather spend $60 to purchase:

• 2 new pairs of shoes for the twins.
• 1 ticket to a Disney theme park.
• 12 gallons of milk.
• Sushi and sake at our favorite restaurant.
• A year's supply of toothpaste.
• The monthly water/sewer bill.
• Tickets to see Harry Potter 5.6 times.

Day 2: Siesta In A Sienna

Spent most of the day in my new 'Luxury Liner'.  It handles really well--despite feeling like I'm piloting a large jetliner.

We also completed our original mission:  pick up these adorable ladies from the airport.  Of course, this could have easily been accomplished without a minivan if only someone were willing to be strapped to the roof of my car.  

By the way, the twins were equally as happy as our guests; they're just playing a new game called 'Let's Purposely Do the Opposite Of What Mommy Wants'.  It's a ton of fun.  I hope we play it more often.

Day 1: Siesta In A Sienna

I've got a dear friend from Japan bringing her daughters to visit for the weekend.  What better time to rent a minivan and find out once and for all if I can handle minivan ownership?

Yes, I'm aware fish are drying up in blood-red pools of water, children are starving in Africa, and a crippling heat has seized half of my motherland.  In fact, I'm sure this is directly related to the invention of the minivan--but I just can't.  Help.  Myself.

I've had a love/hate relationship with minivans most of my life.  I loved them growing up--so much in fact I resented the owners of our station wagon (sorry Oma-ma and Gah Gah).  In my teens I thought they were ugly.  Then I spent most of my 20s firmly believing if every gas guzzling minivan and SUV owner could simply live with less horsepower, and removable third-row seating, we'd all be a happier, more eco-friendly society.

Now with two dogs, a set of twins, and endless streams of summer guests (which, by the way, is my favorite part of living at the beach) my resolve is cracking.  IF we purchase a minivan, I'm only looking at the Toyota Sienna--solely based on this YouTube commercial.

So here we go, Day 1 of the Siesta In A Sienna!

It fits in the garage!!  Barely.  I am in love with the sliding side doors--a very timely plus since Finn & Belle insist on walking themselves to their car seats.  I no longer have to play the 'which side of the door are you on now' game.  Nor do I have to trap them between the door and the car in public--now I can shove them both into the minivan where they can learn to wait patiently for Mommy to buckle them in.

Ah, space!  No more kicking the driver's seat, and they can barely touch each other--a concern since they recently learned how to annoy the other by simply breathing.  What you can't see is Lavender chilling behind Lady Belle.  Two years of pent up resentment for being relegated to second class citizenship could be washed away with this 'simple' purchase.

Just how much is this space worth!?!  Clearly the real question.  Stay tuned for the rest of the adventure!!

All I Need Is. . .

A Wii and one year.  Watch out super adorable twin boys, this closet stage mom is ready to. Take. You. Down.

Move Over Jane Goodall . . .

I've got some primitive animals worth studying in their natural habitat.  This is Lady Belle--standing at roughly the height of a doorknob and able to mimick the screams of the most convincing damsel in a low-budget, horror flick.

Apparently in this moment, Finn wanted to read a book that Belle banned from story time.  Of course, being the super amazing mother that I am, instead of creating an intervention I opted for a quick retreat to find my camera and document this magnificent display of literary censorship at it's finest.  

Daddy's Juice

Yup, that's exactly what Lady Belle said as she pointed to this empty bottle on the counter; and after a long day of work in an office with subpar air conditioning--I bet it's just as refreshing as her apple juice.

My apologies to those who believe it's a sin to legally consume alcohol and expect your underage children to follow those same legal standards.  It's also a sin to be prideful and judgmental . . .

Intervention!!!

I just found myself researching minivans today . . . for the sole purpose of finding a vehicle large enough to allow me the luxury of sitting as far away as possible from my (ever sweet) Hellcats.

Any suggestions?

Chocoholics Anonymous

Lady Belle is quite possibly one of the most dainty eaters I've encountered in a while (she gets it from me)--that is, until she's confronted with chocolate (also mine).  For some reason the mere sight, smell (probably sound) of chocolate turns my mild mannered Sugar Drop into some other-worldly, half-vampire love child.  Basically she temporarily adopts the 'Finn Method' for food consumption.

PS:  I love my children so much!!

One For Every Day Of The Week

Well trembling tracks (for those Thomas fans out there)!!  I'm smitten with all the toddler girl rompers available.  I want Lady M in all of them!!  If the Universe is listening, she's size 2T and looks adorable in any color.  Now all I need are matching Band-Aids . . .

Where Have You Been?

We got iPhones a few weeks ago and I'm addicted to Words with Friends and Boggle--oh, and I've been killing it selling wine!  I'm secretly in love with my boss--she's Ah-mazing!  She  requires I sip each wine at a tasting, let's me work flex time and thinks I have the most adorable twins in the entire world.

Dave (excuse me, I must start referring to him only as 'Daddy' since Lady M started saying 'Dave' over and over again recently) has been a trooper about my wine business (of course, he gets to sample the inventory regularly so it's a win/win).  One happy bonus, the twins are getting to spend more quality time with Daddy and (secretly) I think Daddy is enjoying his new mini fan club.

This past weekend I attended my first official event as a vendor for the 4th Annual Taste of Wilmington Food & Wine event.  I enlisted the help of some wonderful friends to greet the 500+ guests on hand.  It was a crazy, fun time.

In other news, preschool ends for the summer next week and I'm currently in denial.  I would say we'll spend the summer at the beach and pool--but we've reached that magical age of defiance and irrational independence which doesn't seem to fit well with wide open spaces and deep waters.

Here's a picture of the munchkins to hold you over till my next random post.

Who Doesn't Love Grandchildren?

That's what my Grandma declared earlier this evening and she makes a very compelling case.    Her basic philosophy being parents are so busy trying to do the right thing and focused on being the best parents for their children they often miss out on the simple joys and love children can bring.  At least that's her main justification for spoiling us rotten when we were little (not complaining one bit).

On that note, I'm looking forward to becoming a grandparent (in 30 years, of course).  I plan to spoil my grandchildren R.O.T.T.E.N. and love every stinkin' minute of it!!

Did You Document It?

We've reached yet another milestone . . . double skinned knees!!  Right before bath time, Dave asked if I'd taken a photo of their first ever Band-Aids (silly question).

Both twins were rather intrigued by the new 'stickers'; but ultimately very excited to have their own 'boo boo'.  Looks like Mommy needs to grab some super cool Elmo Band-Aids the next time she's out shopping.

Picasso Strikes Again!

I was 'one of those' women convinced I'd never let my children color on furniture, write on walls or do anything remotely undignified as crushing crayons into the carpet.  Seriously, all one need do is watch your children and they won't destroy the leather ottoman you got on clearance for a truly 'irreplaceable' price, right?

Then I had twins and those twins became toddlers . . . I promise to never judge another mother (so long as we both shall live).  After an entire day of fighting for the same exact toy, crying because one was staring into the other's personal space, and demanding to be carried from Point A to Point B and then back again, come 5 o'clock Mommy was relieved by the quiet contentment a few crayons and a coloring book could bring.  

Of course, that contentment turned into the unusual sound of scrapping against the wall.  A sound that falls into the 'things that shouldn't make a noise when you're playing' category.  Yup, my little delinquents were coloring on the wall--right beside me.  I've no credible excuse for not catching the vandals before it was too late.

Many heart-felt thanks to Mr. Clean and his Magic Eraser (so refreshing when a product actually lives up to its fanciful name).

Well, of course, I took a picture of the bandits caught in the act.  

I'm saving these moments for my 'Your First Real Paycheck 

Should Buy Mommy A Diamond Necklace' scrapbook.

Let's Just Say

I'm thrilled this is not me.  We don't know them, but their story was a possible path for us at one time.  I'm sending them a ton blessings on a challenging, yet rewarding, life.

Strange Things Happen When The Sun Goes Down

Yesterday two tricycles arrived in the mail for Finn & Belle!  They're 'early' birthday presents from Nana & Pap Pap and couldn't have come at a better time.  The weather is perfect right now and the only place the twins want to be is outside in their wagon or blowing bubbles (very charmed life, indeed).

With the introduction of these little trikes comes the official end to my quest for parking both cars in our two car garage (shoot me if we ever become a three car family before there are three legitimate drivers in this household).

Next step, Tricycle Pronunciation and Physical Training School.  Right now they're called 'cycles' and only seem to work when Mommy pushes them . . .

Here's some photos of the new wheels (What?  You thought they'd be of the twins?  Haven't you seen enough of them already!?!):

For some reason, a wave of nostalgia convinced me this was not only possible, but also would be fun--in the end it just made me feel way, way, way too old.  I remember rockin' the Hot Wheels 3-Wheeler back in 'da day' at my Grandma's--that ride did not feel so . . . snug.

There were a few minutes when we thought an emergency run to Toys R Us would be necessary to replace one little boy's dream--crisis averted!

Crimes Against Technology

Most of my mommy friends have iPhones. and apparently they all look like this.  I can't WAIT to get mine!  I wonder if Apple will ship it already broken and save me the hassle.

Daddy, He's Your Son

I assumed all little boys put Kix up their nose.  

Then I called 'Aunt Shannon' who said 'not all boys.'

I'll only claim her as my own because she has the good sense 

to accessorize with any available object.

There's Simply No Excuse

I decided to bake some chocolate chip cookies the other day; the old-fashioned way--store bought cookie dough, already portioned, ready for baking.  This concept is really a brilliant idea.  There's no dirty kitchen.  No sticky fingers.  No thought.

Exhibit A:  The Mutant Cookies

I'm still trying to figure out what went wrong.  My execution was not as 'turn key' as anticipated.  Quite frankly, I feel the need to submit a formal apology to my children and husband.  Apparently when Mommy's in the kitchen it's a culinary roller coaster ride of extreme food highs and some super bombs that no normal dog would eat (completely justifying why my dogs are officially abnormal).

While these cookies were definitely not 'show-worthy'; they still tasted good and were completely devoured . . . mostly by me.

Happy Little Paddy's

God bless the genius who invented the bubble machine!  We heart you!

Happy belated St. Patrick's Day!  We rocked our beer mug hats again this year--seemed like the right thing to do!

Diva Da'ling & Super Star

Spring is coming and all the parenting magazines are pushing responsible sun care for the wee ones.  I finally bought the twins some sunglasses--or more accurately I acquired two additional items to break, lose and fight over.

Regardless, they love them and will eventually understand their intended purpose (people watching incognito).

Diva Da'ling loved taking them off; 

then putting them back on again . . . repeatedly.

Super Star enjoyed scrapping them against hard surfaces 

and other acts of death and destruction.

And The Oscar Goes To . . .

Finn! For his dramatic role in the hit movie Diaper Changes.

Here's a preview of what critics are calling:

'Heart Wrenching!' - Mommy
'Un-called For!' - Daddy
'Couldn't stop watching!' - Sister

Dirty Obsessions

Ever since we returned from our trip to New York, the twins have been obsessed with these miniature airplanes we purchased at the airport.  Obsessed--as in eat, sleep and breathe every moment with their airplanes.

Earlier this week they began sleeping with them (currently not regretting this decision--yet).  Yesterday, we reached another crossroads--should they eat with them?  My instincts screamed 'NO!"  It's hard enough getting the twins to focus on eating, let alone comprehending that sticky fingers only touch napkins (should probably introduce the napkin at some point).

Instantly, my vision became clouded with images of action figures covered in mashed potatoes and barbies smothered in ketchup.  I already hate cleaning up after mealtime.  Barbie would never get a bath, she'd take a trip to the nearest GoodWill where we'd officially become known as Those People who donate insults rather than reusable items.

I held my ground during lunch; however, by dinner my resolve broke.  Have you experienced Finn's 'wounded bird' pout (he's on to me).  Obviously, I accept this bad habit with full responsibility (doesn't mean I have to like it).

This morning, all five of us had a peaceful and loving breakfast together (and yes, I did clean the airplanes afterwards--they were bought at a premium in Concourse D).

Dramatic Interpretations

This morning I asked the twins if they wanted to get ready to go outside.  While I was searching for their day clothes they were busy 'getting ready to go outside' . . .

Lady Belle actually put on her shoes and hat, an 'A' for effort.

Never mind the shoes are on the wrong feet . . .

Well, Finn, he ran and grabbed . . . a shoe . . . 

from Mommy's closet . . . A+ for creativity!!

It's Been A Long Time . . .

Since someone said 'I don't know how you do it, with twins'.  Last Friday I tortured at least 15 people, a poor waitress, and myself by taking the twins to a weekly breakfast with friends; an event I normally enjoy while the twins are in school.

Mirabelle threw all three pieces of my bacon on the floor.  Which is a serious misdemeanor in our house (as I love bacon--and at that moment in time, slightly more than my children).  Finn wasn't interested in eating, sitting or (thankfully) bacon.  He was, however, interested in climbing bar stools, running for the nearest exit and exploring any area with an 'employees only' sign attached.

We've finally reached a point where eating out is not nearly as enjoyable as past experiences (crying on the inside).  On the positive side, we can start eating outside again--apparently our little haven of coastal oasis is being spared by the nation's arctic blasts.

For those just checking in, I'm not a big fan of feeding the twins at home 3x a day.  More accurately, I'm not a fan of cleaning up after feeding the twins 3x a day.  However, things are slightly better, thanks to preschool!  Instead of the ritual plate tossing when they're done eating, the twins now simply push their plates back and say some incomprehensible form of 'all done'.

Of course, as I write this, Lady Belle decides to dump her cereal on her tray and toss the bowl to the floor . . .

Introducing Something New

Well, I apologize for the neglect.  Things have been moving quickly this month.  For starters, I've taken the plunge into something new.  I'm now an Independent Wine Consultant for WineShop At Home.

Basically, I get paid to hang out with cool people and drink wine all day--Best.  Job.  Ever.  Actually, I just pretend to drink wine all day (don't judge; I'm selling a reputation).  With that said, I'd officially like to introduce something new:

It's official, I'm now an Independent Wine Consultant for WineShop At Home.  Some of you have heard me talk about this recently.  Dave and I decided this business would be the perfect opportunity for us to meet new people locally and for me to spend some of my 'free time' on making a little extra money while working from home.  Our main focus as a family, of course, is loving and raising Finn & Belle--that's why this new business is so perfect.  I can manage the majority of it without having to sacrifice quality time away from our sweet 'babies' (they're not really babies any more; but they sure are sweet!). 

With that said, we'd love your support as we launch into this new opportunity.  Many of you are too far away to support me at the local level by hosting a private wine tasting; however, you can support me by visiting my website and joining our wine of the month club.  You can also view the various wines and products sold, if you see something you like, feel free to order it through my site.  If you have any questions about our products, I'd be happy to answer them.  Here's a link to my website:

www.carolinawineshop.com

WineShop At Home is a direct sales winery operating out of Napa Valley, CA.  They specialize in producing reserve-quality, limited production, artisan wines.  You can only buy these wines through me or another Independent Wine Consultant (pick me! pick me!).  My business is solely based on word-of-mouth, so any efforts you can make to help spread the word about my new business opportunity is greatly appreciated.

If you're interested in learning how to become an Independent Wine Consultant yourself, let me know.  I'd love to share this fun experience with you!

And there you have it:  the perfect job for a stay at home mother of twins.  Wish us luck!

The Reality of Fantasies

During our one, brief, shining foray into warmer weather, we spent some time admiring all the boats docked at the marina while taking lunch at Dockside.

This one was right next to the restaurant and my first choice as a possible future boat purchase--until Dave mentioned the only way we could call it ours was if it were our permanent residence:

Maybe this one is more within the rehelm of possibility.  We could call it 'Fertility Treatment' in honor of it's price tag:

However, if we're being painfully honest, this is realistically the only boat we should own; and not nearly as satisfying to fantasize about:

Beach Life Is The Good Life

So read the bumper sticker on the back of a local car--after this weekend, I'd have to agree.

While most of the United States is cloaked in some kind of polar changing, alternate reality, Al Gore apocalyptic weather pattern, we've been sitting pretty with mostly sunny upper 60's weather (please don't hate).

In fact, Sunday was just about perfect.  After church we took the kids out for lunch at Dockside--a local restaurant with a ton of patio seating along the Intercoastal waterway.  It was the good life and I've the pictures to prove it.

Feel free to check the weather and come on down for a visit--you know, between plowing snow every 15 minutes or visiting Lowcountry oyster roasts . . . (of course, now I've jinxed everything).

Watching the boats and birds, coloring, enjoying the sun, waiting for some fried shrimp . . .

One day, I promise, Lady Belle's hair will actually look, well, like a Lady.  

Bubble Wrap Appreciation Day

Happy 50th Anniversary Bubble Wrap. Here's a fun site to surf while you pretend to work (or ignore your children--don't judge).

http://www.bubblewrapfun.com/

Random Conversations

Overheard while driving home from church:

Me:  'Finnlay, please don't open the car door while Daddy is driving.  You could fall out and get hurt.  You'd feel really bad and Mommy would be very, very sad.  You're irreplaceable--one of a kind.'

Dave:  'Unlike Daddy, who has an identical brother, which makes him two of a kind . . . '

Don't worry, folks.  We've activated the child safety locks on the car now that the twins have located the door handles and found immeasurable joy in touching them.

Say 'Cheese!!'

The Dynamic Duo is actually smiling for the camera these days.  Here's some pictures of the twins eating grilled cheese sandwiches while saying 'Cheese' for the camera.

Eating Out Saves . . . Something

Just a quick update on the 2011 Resolutions:  Current count 5 for 11!  Almost halfway to the finish line--because doing something 'once' does count as 'regularly' since it's only January [insert cheeky grin].

Last weekend was Only Child Day for Finn & I.  We picked up Finn's new girlfriend 'Aunt Ash' and did some shopping, then enjoyed a relaxing lunch.

On Sunday, we all FINALLY went to church for the very first time as a family.  We dropped the twins off in the nursery--Dave & Finn both struggled with this transition (men!).  Then Dave & I enjoyed a wonderfully quiet, calming, relaxing (Dave would add boring) church service.  After that we headed out for lunch to celebrate the monumental occasion of being awake, dressed and out of the house before 2pm on a Sunday.

You see a trend . . . Emily likes to eat out--for so many reasons.  The main one being someone else gets the honor of cleaning up after my toddlers.  Because cleaning up after the twins often ends in hallucinations of raising swine.  Which couldn't possibly come from my gene pool, leaving Dave the sole carrier of these mutant genes.  Then the cycle of resentment sets in and suddenly spending $30 to feed a family of four in order to spare feelings of resentment seems ridiculously cheap.  Thus, eating out saves . . . my sanity.

Mildly Creepy

Tonight was 'Buddy Night' at preschool.  A special one hour arts and crafts time for Daddy and the twins.  I arrived a little early to pick them up--thus proving the theory I CAN be on time when I've only myself to dress and feed.  I couldn't resist watching them through the classroom window (Hello, Creepy).  As if sitting in a parked car after dark staring into a classroom full of toddlers isn't obsessive enough, I also felt compelled to take a few photos (Hello, Stalker).

Dave holding Finn and The Pink Swan, Mirabelle, taking flight.

Daddy stealing kisses from Finn [insert collective sigh].

After a few bizarre stares from people in the parking lot, 

I finally went legit and walked inside.